How NOT to get revenge

There are hundreds of thousands of people have had marriage/relationship break downs. In many cases they simply not meant to be no matter how hard you try.
The reasons are many and varied, some with other people involved, others simply because life and all it’s trials get in the way and the relationship simply cannot withstand the pressure.
In both my cases all I wanted was to be done with them and move on once the decision was made to finish it.
There were no thoughts of revenge or payback, none of those things.
Now, if I had been inclined to making sure they suffered I’m hoping I would be smarter than this
The time between the break up and the attempted act of revenge amused me too I must say. Why the devil would you wait so damned long?
Did this woman sit at home for 8 years trying to decide which manner of pay back was best? Did she sit in her lounge chair every night dreaming of revenge on an old boyfriend?
If she did it was obviously time wasted because she didn’t even have the intelligence to not use her home computer.
She would have been better off at an internet cafe? At least the IP address would have been generic instead of her home address!
Let this be a lesson to anyone considering getting their own back, even if it is 8 years after a break up.
Try and learn form the error of this woman’s ways.
If you want pay back, just shoot the bastard, then noone else can have him either! Not only that, youre pretty much guaranteed 3 meals a day and a bed for around 20 years. Who knows, you may find out you don’t like men after all and in fact want to munch the rug.
Sounds more practical to me. If I’m going to jail it’s for a real crime, not some pissy little kick him in the balls reason.
~knowledgable~

This works well

Ladies, there are many ways to keep your man happy if you’re so inclined {which is probably not a bad idea if you want the trash taken out and the lawns mowed}

There are many ways for a man to keep a woman happy too, but that’s another post.

The advice I have today is short, sweet and very, very deep.

“To keep a man totally happy, you need to be 3 women in one.
A lady in the lounge, a chef in the kitchen and a slut in the bedroom”

Typical bloody men, never satisfied with one!!

~knowledgable~

I think the end is near

The time is coming when this will end I think. Very soon.
Time is an enemy, and 4 is maybe too much?
Haven’t completely decided yet, but my instincts are generally pretty spot on.
Don’t be surprised to click the link one day and find it deleted. Stats are still not too bad is the thing. Bizarre huh?
We’ll see…..

My very first time

As promised, I’m going to teach you all about nude garden gnome restoration.
Now, many times I’ve been asked whether the gnome or your person are the nude ones. As most of you know by now, the answer is either can be nude, or if it takes your fancy, both.
Now, I need to warn you, a nude gnome is NOT a pretty sight before you restore it!
All I need say here is, have you EVER seen a concrete penis with lots of holes in it??? It is not for the faint hearted I have to say, and in fact my first glimpse of said penis was quite disturbing. It cost me 000’s in therapy, and there are nights when I still have nightmares about it! (must deal with it…MUST!!!)
Perhaps you would be best to start with yourself nude as opposed to the gnome? It could be less stressful for your first time.
I speak with authority here.
*Please heed this advice! *
Now, just to whet your appetite, I’ve generously decided to share my very first experience in this wonderful hobby.
Picture one is of a sad, lost soul I found laying in the garden of a deserted house. He was in SUCH a state the poor little mite. It almost bought me to tears it was so sad! He was the inspiration behind my passion for this much under rated pass time.

I spent weeks lovingly bring this little guy back to life.
I gave him a new colour.
I gave him personality.
I gave him some wonderful clothes.
I even gave him a light to shine so that other lost souls would find their way to my haven, and a book to read so he would have an opportunity to better himself.
But the most important thing?
I gave him dignity! Why should these much maligned, inoffensive little decorations NOT have their dignity I ask??
Why should they lack the one thing that means much to you and I?
It shouldn’t be so! They should have pride! So I gave it to him, out of the goodness of my heart and because to that point his life had obviously been difficult! {I try to be charitable to those less fortunate than myself. Giving is good for the soul you know!}
See below for the end result of many hours of loving care and attention.
On the really positive side, I did this during summer, and as I wasn’t quite ready to restore a nude gnome at that stage, I myself was naked, and now have a wicked all over tan!
The benefits of this hobby are enormous, and I will clarify some of them in the next lesson, but for now, I merely wanted to highlight my very first project.
I hope you gain as much pleasure from seeing the end result as I did actually creating it!
~Knowledgable~

For the guys

The bulk of our wisdom has been for the girls, so I thought I’d balance the scales with a small piece of advice for the guys. Just a quickie though. Don’t want to be giving the shop away do we girls?

If you remember this always, it will stand you in good stead.

More than likely get you laid at some point too.

Ladies, take a bow

We’ve done it!

Hit a 1000!!

go us…go us..go uss uss uss!!

*doin’ the happy dance*

For a blog that started as a bit of a giggle on a bottle and a half of Merlot, we’ve done well..

Cheers, girls. I tip my hat to you